Comfort
by Lost to the Hoping
Summary: Except she wasn't supposed to think that because he was her friend and friends stayed friends, and she wasn't supposed to fall for a guy that couldn't possibly love her back. NekoHaru


The phone dropped from nerveless fingers and Ranka looked up from his dinner, blinking as his daughter stared wide-eyed at the wall. Her mind was blank, completely ignorant of the buzzing of the voice on the other end of the line. Ranka was kneeling beside her and speaking into the phone now, suddenly it seemed, and she couldn't bring herself to look at him and see his reaction. Couldn't bare to watch as his shoulders tightened and his mouth formed a grim line, and when he reached for her, she pulled away until she had to step back. Numbly, she turned around and walked slowly in the opposite direction, heedless of his voice calling out to her as the front door closed with a quiet _snick_ in her wake.

Her pace picked up as she walked down the stairs, and when she was at the bottom, she was jogging, then half sprinting, and by the time she reached the street, she was full out running, ignoring the burning in her side and the blurry quality of her vision. She sped down the street, turned the corner, ran, ran, ran ran... Eventually, she was forced to come to a stop, and she had no idea where she was except she was on her knees beside a bench, slowly reaching up as gasping breaths forced themselves to tear through her lungs and throat. Her fingers touched her wet cheeks, uncomprehending - _a voice in her head asked if it was raining, but she didn't notice_ - and then her pale fingers slid up into her hair, gripped... and _pulled_. And she let herself scream and scream and scream and scream.

Sometime in the middle, there was someone in front of her, and then she was surrounded, and it felt so stuffy. She jerked away from the person - _her vision was way too blurry to see their face, but she was almost positive it was a woman_ - as her screaming was forgotten, unnoticed to begin with. She spun around and darted away, running full tilt down a hill in the road. She tripped, scrambled to her feet again, ran. Again she stopped, again she screamed, again she ran from the attention - _why couldn't they just fucking leave her alone, dammit?_

Gasping and sobbing, she stumbled into an old part of town - _had she really run this far? Truly? _- and stumbled over a broken crate in an alleyway. She was too exhausted to scream anymore, so she just curled up into a ball beside a trashcan, shivering with cold and certain something wet was touching her face. After a moment, she realized it was a washcloth, and someone was suddenly crouched there, wiping her tears away gently.

Wildly, she reached out and grabbed thin shoulders, looking up into a startled semi-familiar face. "Oh, gods... Make it go away. If only just for a while, make it go away and I swear I'll never ask anything of you again." Wide, dark blue eyes gentled at her request and he nodded.

A hand paler, much paler, than her own reached out and tilted her chin up, and she was being kissed without any words from him, but she just relaxed into it, letting sensation wash everything away.

-

_Wednesday, October 7th_

_The Ouran High Tribune_

_We are sad to announce the passing of four very special students of our esteemed Ouran Academy, high school section. 18 year old Morinazuka Takashi, 17 year old Suoh Tamaki and 17 year old Ootori Kyoya were killed in a car crash last night at 7:42 pm, and 16 year old Hitachiin Hikaru was announced dead at 8:05 en route to the nearest hospital. 16 year old Hitachiin Kaoru is awake and recovering in the hospital with minor burns, 3 broken ribs and a gash along his left side, and 18 year old Haninozuka Mitsukuni was released with only heavy bruising and minor scratches early this morning._

_We are all wishing and praying for Hitachiin's quick recovery, and the school mourns the loss of the remainder of the Ouran High Hostu Bu._

-

"Tadaima!" Umehito called unnecessarily as he stepped inside his house. He knew his parents were gone at their jobs and his sister was probably working hard in her new art club. Still... He looked down at the rolled up newspaper in his hands.

They'd been sold out when he tried to buy one, so he'd threatened to curse a random girl if she didn't give it to him. Unfortunate, but necessary, especially since it explained Haruhi's listless attitude. He still couldn't believe it. Four of them, all in one fell swoop. His head gave a slow shake as he slowly made his way up the stairs, eyes scanning the desired article.

He distractedly opened the door of his room and kicked it closed, then looked up through his comfortable darkness. Haruhi was just as he'd left her, laying on her left side and staring at the wall. Had she truly not left all day? He had been sure there would eventually be some maid or other come through and clean the room up. Had they not noticed her? Or maybe they'd thought she was a dead body.

She certainly could play one well enough.

He sighed and made his way to the bed, sitting beside her. She was still naked underneath the sheets, and he felt a little bad about taking advantage of her like that. But she'd been so desperate, and had responded as if his thus far unrequited feelings had for once been returned. He knew it wasn't true, but he could hope, and he'd always been great at deluding himself.

"Haruhi?" He touched her hair gently. He asked the same thing he had that morning. "Do you want me to bring you home now?"

After a moment, she turned her head and looked at him. Her eyes were clearer than they'd been when he'd found her yesterday, but she'd probably just been in a daze after she woke up. She sighed. "What's happening to me, Nekozawa-senpai?" she asked softly, brow furrowing. "I'm... I wasn't this sad, this... _depressed_ when my mom died. Why now? Why them?"

He shrugged and smoothed her hair, frowning himself as he glanced around the familiar room. "Normally, people would sit here and feed the grieving person a bunch of bullshit about pain and sympathy, and how the gods or fate works, but... While I could tell you about _my_ gods, you probably do want to hear, so I'll offer my shoulder and my flesh, to do with as you please."

Her eyes closed and she was crying again.

-

Haruhi was shortly convinced to go home - after two days at the Nekozawa residence, though she only actually slept with him that first night - and her father was crying on her shoulder as he pulled her tight and swore he'd never let go of her again. Listlessly, she pushed him away and went through the motions of making tea, the silence between them palpable. That was the way they remained until she went to bed sometime around ten and stared at the wall until sunrise.

She woke up for the bathroom, or when Ranka forced her to eat something, but for the most part, she slept through the entire next day and halfway into the one after that. When she was too well-rested to sleep, she walked around the living room, and Ranka asked if she wanted to go to school. She said she'd go tomorrow.

And go she did; maybe the monotony would be absolved.

-

She met Hani-senpai on the way to her lunch period, and he started to tear up when his eyes met her's. They went into a library and cried for what seemed like hours. He told her the specifics - _something happened and the driver had a seizure or something like that, Tamaki tried to grab the steering wheel, but it was already too late and he was thrown through the windshield. Kyoya's neck broke when he was reaching out to grab the blond and suddenly jerked back against the seat, his head snapping back with force enough to kill him. Hikaru lost his arm, that had been hanging out the window, and bled to death on the way to the hospital, while Mori died shielding Hani from shrapnel_ - and for some reason, it relieved her that most had died instantly. But she still cried for Hikaru, who'd suffered.

Kaoru was faking a smile when he finally came to school, a little after lunch. But upon seeing her, he trembled and scooped her into a crushing hug, sobbing on her shoulder in the middle of the classroom. Together, and apart, the remains of the host club and their close friends and enemies grieved.

Maybe, Haruhi thought as she realized one day that she could deal with the pain a little easier, just maybe they would eventually heal with time.

But she still cried a lot.

-

Nekozawa was relieved to find that she didn't avoid him after their time together, purposely sought him out actually. He'd been so afraid that she'd see what they'd done as a mistake and it would be awkward to her, but when she joined him outside after school as he sat in the shade of a Sakura tree, three days after she'd returned to school, he was glad. They didn't really talk - didn't need to, in fact - and just sat. She laid her head against his shoulder for a few moments at one point, and when he didn't move to push her away - he would surely have done so with anyone else - she told him she was glad he'd been there.

His heart warmed.

-

Time passed and first six months, then a year had gone by, and Haruhi, now a second year, found herself in the third music room on the anniversary of their deaths. Not long after that, Hani-senpai and Nekozawa-senpai joined her from the college division of Ouran Academy, and Kaoru eventually showed up too. They didn't need words but Hani chattered excitedly and set up a little picnic of sweets and spicy foods in the middle of the floor. Haruhi found it in herself to laugh, Kaoru actually teased Umehito, and the dark boy smiled more than once at Haruhi.

Her heart fluttered and she smiled back.

"Haru-chan! Look, taste this!" He held out a cheese cake with strawberries on top, and she was reminded of the time Mori-senpai had given her his own. She felt a pang, but managed a smile and gratefully accepted the sweet. Hani beamed and made Umehito take a dark chocolate cake and eat it on pain of humiliation, and Kaoru ate his own banana and chocolate pudding without complaint.

"How do you think they see us?" Kaoru asked after a while, receiving several saddened looks. "Do you think we look happy again?"

"Maybe just a little," Haruhi agreed after a moment of silence. "We're slowly moving on, but I bet Kyoya's increased my debt tenfold." That got chuckles and she grinned.

Hani jumped to his feet and straightened, grabbing up a tray and pretending to write on it with a candy cane. "Ah... Haruhi... Mourning? We don't have time for that... Five hundred yen more on your debt." He looked up, comically serious, and pretended to adjust imaginary glasses. "Unless you have a passport...?"

"Sorry, Kyoya-senpai," she said with a shrug. "I don't think I have the money."

Kaoru gasped and clutched his chest in an exaggerated manner. "But... But! Surely that doesn't mean you're leaving!? Nooo! Daddy won't let you!" He glomped her, and the three dissolved into giggles. Umehito smiled, feeling a little left out. But he didn't dare join in; he was too afraid of offending one of them.

Kaoru then got up and pointed at a surprised Nekozawa. "You! I knew it! You've cuuursssseeedddd meee! No! My Kuma-chan!" Even the darker boy laughed at that; he sure had Suoh spot on, didn't he?

"Oh, shut up, Tamaki," Hani muttered, pretend scribbling something on his tray. "If you're so afraid of him cursing you, maybe you should stop antagonizing him."

"But it's funny, Kyoya-senpai," Haruhi replied bluntly, and Hani paused, looking up and quirking a brow. "Really," the girl added.

"... A thousand more yen."

"Noooo! If you indebt her anymore, mommy, she'll have to sell her body for foooooodddd!!!" Kaoru wailed, dropping to his knees in order to hang off of Hani.

"That would be _her_ fault." Hani clapped a hand on the tray to mime snapping a book closed. "Now, I believe we have food to eat, so get off of me, you dolt."

Kaoru slow-motion fainted, moaning out, "Mommy hates Daddy, Haruhi..."

"I don't care."

"Nooo!!!"

Their laughter echoed through the empty halls.

-

As the year wore on, Haruhi found herself thinking more and more about the silent, dark prince of Ouran that was more or less at her side whenever he could be. He was so supportive; she found it surprising that in the aftermath of her sorrow, she'd managed to find such a good friend as he.

Whenever she needed someone to talk to, he was easily found (there weren't that many dark places in the school, after all, and she had his cell phone number), and if she just wanted to go out without worrying her father by being alone, he was always happy to join her, not that Kaoru and Hani weren't. He made her calm, he balanced her out, and most of all, he didn't pressure her to talk when she didn't want to. Or rather, perhaps he didn't need her to tell him. Maybe he just knew, whether by voodoo or simply because they'd known each other that long.

He really was the perfect guy...

Except she wasn't supposed to think that because he was her friend and friends stayed friends, and she wasn't supposed to fall for a guy that couldn't possibly love her back. Ever, except... Dare she hope that every time she caught him looking at her, it wasn't because she'd caught his eye, but because he'd been watching her since before she glanced his way?

Maybe, in the same way her eye seemed to continuously stray to his form whenever he was near, he felt just as drawn. Maybe she should find out... Maybe not.

Haruhi sighed and shook the thoughts away, glancing out the window of her classroom as she thought about stopping her studying for the day and seeing if she couldn't catch any of the boys heading home and strong arm a ride off of them. Not that she needed to ask anymore; if they saw her after school, it was automatically assumed that she'd be given a lift.

She scooped up her books and dumped them into her bag, stacked her papers into a folder and did the same with it, and walked out of the room, pulling the strap on over her shoulder. Sure enough, she met Nekozawa leaving from his Black Magic Club meeting and without needing words, they both headed toward his waiting limo.

"How went your studying?" he asked after they'd climbed in and gotten situated.

"Boring," she replied. "I couldn't focus today, I guess."

A blond brow quirked, his wig resting in his lap so that she had a full view of his normally shrouded face. "Oh? What kept you so preoccupied?"

She blushed at the reminder of what had indeed kept her head in the clouds, and was mortified to realize that he actually sat right next to her. "O-oh... Just... stuff."

He frowned worriedly, but didn't pry, and for a moment she felt guilty. Well, more than a moment, and the silence was stretching around them awkwardly until she thought she'd burst. Luckily, she just gave in and spilled. "Well... I was thinking about a friend, actually."

"A friend?"

"Yeah." She looked down at her fingers, suddenly nervous of speaking to him about it - _what if he doesn't like me after all? I mean, it was just speculation earlier..._ - but she forced herself to go on. "A guy friend. Though I guess that doesn't exactly narrow it down, huh?" She laughed, very aware that he was watching her every move as if one of their lives depended on it. Maybe his; probably her's. "He's... I think he's... very special to me, you know? But I don't want to talk to him about it... Because I'm afraid it'll just ruin what we have and leave me with nothing."

He was silent a moment, some strangled emotion in his eyes as he tried not to show it. "Do I... know him? Maybe I could help; see if he likes you."

That was ironic. "Yeah. You know him. Sort of, but you probably couldn't ask him if he likes me. That might be a little crazy." She bit her lip and forced herself to look up at him, afraid of the awkward worry she was sure she'd see on his face. Instead, he looked frozen, hopeful, hesitant. All at once, he made her think of a little boy that had just been promised the reunion of he and his favorite relative, only to be told that they might not make it.

A rather ironic comparison if there ever was one, she mused. "He's... rather strange, to most people," she went on, swallowed, continued. "I don't think so, though. Eccentric, maybe, but... That can be good. I-"

"Haruhi." The strangled whisper cut off her words immediately and she looked down, blushing and feeling stupid. How could she say these things? She wasn't even sure if what she felt was attraction or not. Stupid Haruhi...

"Sorry," she mumbled, and was surprised when his hand reached out and tipped up her chin, so like that first time, the night she'd... Well, slept with him. It seemed like such a long time ago now.

"Is it not to conceited of me to hope you're referring to myself?" he asked softly.

Haruhi's eyes widened. No. This wasn't true. He couldn't... Had he? All along? She swallowed. "Yeah; it's you."

He smiled, in his normal creepy manner (though it somehow managed to be endearing to her now) and kissed her. Shit. Kaoru was going to kill him, she realized, but suddenly it didn't matter.

-

**Some months later**

"Okay, wait, wait, wait, back up," Kaoru said, waving his hands as he stared at his tiny friend. "They what?"

Hani sighed and shook his head, closing his phone and putting it away. "Eloped," he replied in amusement. "Nekozawa left Kirimi the empire and took Haruhi with him and left, right after graduation." Blue eyes sparkled with glee. "They left a note with Ranka-san and he found it this morning and called the Nekozawa household, furious."

Kaoru smacked his forehead with the base of his palm and kept it there, sighing. "This seems like Tamaki-style recklessness to me."

"He must have rubbed off on her," Hani replied wickedly, squeezing Kaoru's hand. "Well... Guess we don't have to hide if from those two anymore, ne?"

Kaoru scowled lightly at his smaller lover, but it was without heat. "No, just the rest of the world." He smiled at Hani's laughter and looked out the window. "Wow... So they eloped, huh? Who would have thought..."

"Well, they have been spending so much time with each other for a while," Hani replied nonchalantly, shrugging. "They were bound to fall in love eventually, I just didn't expect them to elope as soon as they did." Honeyed brows drew together, as if he knew he was missing something, but couldn't quite figure out what.

"I think they've been hiding it from us," his younger lover stated seriously, pulling him closer. "And dammit, they did it really well, too. Haruhi's not the sort to go and recklessly elope with someone immediately after she realizes she loves them. They probably realized this sometime while she was in second year or something."

Hani nodded, thoughtful. "We never did find out where she'd been those two days after the accident. Maybe she was with him?"

"Maybe." Kaoru shrugged. "It isn't impossible, but I don't know." Amber eyes gazed out the window of his room, a little irritated with the entire situation. Why? Why did Haruhi decided to just... run away? Without telling him? Or Hani? With only Umehito for company?

Tamaki truly must have rubbed off on her something awful. Damn whimsical idiot.

-

**The end. XD I wasn't satisfied with the second to last scene at first, but upon adding the last scene, I felt better. Much better. R&R! Expect more NekoHaru one-shots in the future.**

**Feel free to give me prompts for them, too. XD**


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